The way to Criticise

I cannot believe that it has been three weeks since my Greatest week. Time past by so fast. I am still soaking in the happiness I experienced during that week. Haha. You can see that week is really a life-changing week for me.

In everyday lives, we always criticise about something, "This is not good.", "That is not good", "This is lousy and not up to standard.", "He is so incompetent."and many many more. All, these sound familiar right?

The thing is no one pay any attention to criticizing well, so being a critical person and still not hated by a lot of people, I am going to share with you my thoughts on criticizing well. A lot of times, we have seen many people can criticise very "well", they know where all the faults are, where all the weaknesses are. They always focus on the bad things and keep on bombarding on the same fault or weaknesses over and over again but to different audiences and behind the person's back some more. For instance, when the boss makes a mistake because he is careless, you just keep on talking about his mistakes, criticise about his mistake to many people like your family and friends and if you are stupid enough, your colleagues as well. :P

Now I see this kind of criticism is just a form of venting out. This is not criticism at all. I personally think that the word "criticise" has been used in a negative way too many times. A good criticism should be one that accompanies with a solution to change and recognize the good points as well.

For example, the center I am working in recently put up a proposal on a new career path for some vocation. We are given an opportunity to criticise the proposal. Well as usual, a lot of people say this cannot that cannot, but no one offered another solution or at least some directions for the person to think about, for instance, " This job scope is too minor, greater responsibility should be given instead" and so on. Such criticism would be good because it gives the person who genuinely wants feedback, a direction to think and it also shows the person that you are sincere in helping him to change and improve, because you bother to think about it. One should seek out more background information and understand why things are such before offering constructive criticism. Such actions would give yourself more credibility when you offer your criticism as well, thus increasing the chances of your criticism being taken into consideration. Point out the good points as well, to encourage the person that you are paying attention to the effort he has made.

Don't criticise for the sake of criticizing. It does not help at all. Firstly, you are just creating noise pollution, and remember the saying "Empty vessels makes the most noise". Secondly, it does not add credibility to yourself, people would just think you are just out there to create discomfort. Thirdly, it can affect relationship tremendously since receiver of criticism does not feel your sincerity of helping him and only sense your 'hostilities'. And we all know how we react to hostilities.

So do remember, criticise with the intention of helping someone to be better. Point out the mistakes, fault or weaknesses, give a solution or a direction for thinking and do remember to reflect this onto yourself as well, make sure you also do not have the same fault and weaknesses.

Cheers.